Murder?

“If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging?”  - Mark Twain, Following the Equator

Anything goes these days.  Half the population seems to take pride in flying their freak flags.  We have all known individuals who are just a little eccentric.  I know a man who refuses to use a fork.  For him, everything goes down easy with a spoon.  I am acquainted with a young man who has given up completely on deodorant.  He declares, “Deodorant is just not natural for the human being, and the aluminum causes all sorts of health problems.” 

The internet has also performed a great disservice.  All the crazies can form an international support group and encourage each other.  We even have a cable show now on weird obsessions.  Excuse me, I cannot watch.  I am good with whatever you want to do that does not hurt others, but just don’t tell me about it.  I love my ignorance.

Since anything does go these days, someone always carries a good thing too far.  Have you encountered something so offensive that for a moment you . . .  For example, I don’t know why but once upon a time I got up early for one of those “once in a lifetime sale” events.  It was a mistake, and I solemnly promise to never do it again.  I watched in horror as fashionable ladies and distinguished gentlemen morphed into savages.  They grabbed and tugged and rampaged through the store like pirates attacking a defenseless merchant ship.  When it was all over, the store was wrecked, and bargains were toted off in triumph.  I was horrified.  I did not buy a single item, but I watched an amazing demonstration of human nature.

Anything goes, but some behaviors are so disgusting that no punishment seems appropriate.  Last week a young friend of mine was on her way to her downtown job.  She explains that public transportation in New York, Boston, and Chicago uses plastic seats that can be easily scanned for bio hazards.  St. Louis seats are problematic.  When she sat down for her morning ride, she unknowingly sat in the urine left by the previous rider.  Suddenly, the desire to kill took control, and we all have to admit that she had every right to seek justice.  Alas, the culprit had fled, but if he had been available, another crime would certainly have been committed.  Any court on earth would have ruled not guilty by right of self defense.

Perhaps, anything goes is not such a good idea.  Your Mom may have been on to something when she said, “Sit up straight and behave yourself.”